6/01/2007

This is for Blogging for LGBT Families Day!!!!


Whew! I was hoping to be able to get this in today - on the day it's supposed to be in!
Not really sure what to blog about but I decided to try to make it positive. Let's see...as an LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender) Family now with 3 kids we half-expected to be exposed to much more homophobia than we have, in fact, I really can't remember even one incident that we experienced. It was pretty much a non-issue when it was just Laura and I and no kids. Our friends and family knew we were a couple - whoever didn't like it - or didn't support us didn't make it known to us, and even if they did, I doubt it would have mattered much anyway. We are a couple, we are partners. Laura isn't my "roommate" or my "special friend" or even just "friend", we are partners in life. We were (still are) a couple and that's that.
Then we added kids to the mix and I expected some homophobia or stupid comments. Didn't get any, at least not to our faces. Our friends have been amazing (you know who you are!) since the birth of our kids. When our oldest son spends the night at his best friend's house, we feel 100% positive that they will treat him as their own and that they like us for who we are not what we are. The professionals we've met and dealt with including doctors, daycare providers, public school officials, etc. have been equally supportive. I recall meeting with our pediatrician before Foster was even born (our interview with her) and she stated she had no problems with us being a two-mom family - score! Not that we EXPECTED there to be an issue, but we were still relieved that there were none. And since then, every time we have come-out as a two-mom family to just about anyone, we've been met with nothing but acceptance. AGAIN, if there wasn't any acceptance, then it wasn't made clear to us.
Here in CA, both Laura and I are both the legal parents. Period. Therefore if something happened to me, the law is on Laura's side, as if we were opposite sex parents. There is NOBODY else on the planet that I'd want to parent our children more than my own partner if I wasn't around. NOBODY. They are OUR kids - plain and simple. She's been there since conception (okay, even before) and each and every day afterwards. And of course, I know that our kids wouldn't want ANYONE else than their own mommies to care for them. I feel protected here in this state - protected in the eyes of the law. Other states have to get with the program and extend the same protections to their same sex families that we enjoy here.
Anyway, where was I going with this? Oh yeah, homophobia - I know it exists, but in our personal lives we haven't experienced it in regards to our kids and isn't that what this day is all about -blogging for FAMILIES DAY. We are a family. One we made ourselves with a conscious effort. We didn't get pregnant by accident. It was planned every step of the way. I think that Laura and I have the responsibility to raise our children with the skills they need to start making some changes in the world - because I know there exists lots of homophobia in the world that they may be exposed to. That's an awesome responsibility. I hope to prepare them adequately. There needs to be change, both on the local and federal level. I have hopes that it will change - and one day ALL families - regardless of family make-up will be honored as such.

1 comment:

oneofhismoms said...

It is so nice to meet another optimist. I, too, have had a similar experience. My only negative experiences have been about my son being bi-racial. I have not met with much homophobia at all. I'm grateful for this every single day.